history repeating?

if someone neglected to you for years because there was always something more important - to do, to think about, to care about - if a situation just slightly comes near to that, you get scared.
scared that your personal history might repeat itself. that YOU might repeat your own history, because it's a pattern you follow, whether you want it or not. because that's just the way YOU function.

you are the understanding type. and you like it.
you are someone who can look after oneself. you like that as well.
you are a busy person yourself. you like having a lot to do.

everything seems perfect.
you don't need anyone to entertain you.
you don't need anyone to look after you.
you don't need anyone to understand this.

do you?

you just want to be the most important thing in somebody else's life.

and that's a little too crazy. even for you...

there's is no way out of this, is there?

you will forever understand.
you will forever entertain yourself.
you will forever keep yourself busy.
you will forever NOT complain.
you will forever like being like this.

and history will - FOREVER - repeat itself.

and this ... scares the hell out of me...