music

as the clever friend and (therefore?) talented psychologist might already have detected - easily... ?... i'm not really ok.

although most aspects of my life are going rather well.
still...i catch myself boycotting any kind of relationship (be it friendship or other). and i am really angry about myself for not achieving as much as i did... before. (i run on about 50%, i guess... and i'm sometimes really worried that my effectiveness, the one i've been so proud of and i've relied on for a long time, might not come back.)

well...anyway:
today, i talked to someone about forgetting things and feeling exhausted most of the time.

first suggestion: take some time off, slow it down - jobwise. to that i usually react a little panicky as often my job feels like the only thing keeping me running.
second suggestion - and i really liked that! what about music? it's something different. it keeps your mind busy but in a different way. it's relaxing. distracting. it makes you feel good.

so, what i'll do now?
i'll keep thinking (- how could i not?)

and maybe i'll take a chance and think about slowing it down - just a wee bit... jobwise (if i can afford it...) and take out the clarinett (which i've been thinking about for ages anyway) and maybe start taking lessons again. to have the time - i'll have to cut some other activities short, too.

well. i'll think about it.
and have another look at my favourite instrument of all times...

thanks to "claudius"... ;-)